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For a different woman, a different relationship, a different situation, gentleness might have been the proper, the only approach—but not for this woman, in these circumstances. The only thing that will cleanse Claire and reassure her: look at what she says at the end of it. She feels safe again, having felt the power and violence in him is violence. And—the most important point here—Jamie pays attention to what she wants, rather than proceeding with his own notion of how it should be, even though it’s a sensible notion and the one most people would have.
Diana Gabaldon, “I Give You My Body . . .”: How I Write Sex Scenes